I'm really into asian looking animals
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
