oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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