Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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