he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
