he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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