also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
