Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Randomize
