girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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