idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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