Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
