The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
