I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize
