You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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