the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
