There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
