yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
