So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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