fuck your aforementioned shoe
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
