There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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