I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
