I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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