you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
