This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
