I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize