thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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