Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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