you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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