I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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