Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
