Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize