i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
