Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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