I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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