I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
