I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize