The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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