yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
