i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I FOUND THE LEGS
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
