I'm jealous of your bromance
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
