I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
