the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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