I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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