Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
