You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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