He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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