its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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