i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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