Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
