So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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