the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
